Simplicity Melody

Steps, little paw steps. It's my 3rd year of minimalism journey--maybe it's started with only an intention to clear some clutter and add more space, but turns out it becomes a new religion (?) for me, some kind of...not that extreme, lol. I've experienced so many amazing effects. I've seen changes sparkling around my family's personality. My track is more invisible now, even if it's still uncertain, I feel safe and sure cause I'm not distracted by my gluttony.

Anyway, I'd like to list down some important points in simplifying/decluttering/minimalizing activity. 

1. Avoid being too direct with elder people but stay consistent--working together with babyboomers (those who are around 50-70 years old now), we must perform subtly--they're not used to accept critics, and they believe in social staggers--meaning, if we're younger, we should be VERY POLITE! Growing in the blooming era of drama, romances, postwar products that full of sadness and loss, they've been educated to not letting go. But contradictively, most of our parents' parents (granny and grandpa!) taught them life in a sharp, hardcore way. They're scolded if they do any fault, they couldn't just be themselves easily--life was full of fear-based and pridey rules! I have to remind myself several times, they're sensitive beings, they have gone through hard times--with less technology and ease than our generation. With no horizontal communication with their parents. Don't force them and don't use rude (if not ultrahonest) sentences. We might want to treat them as a friend, and they'd like to, but their childhood senses won't let their guard come off steadily!

Beside, "Dad, you really are a hoarder of gummy bear! Please get rid of it soon!" we better say, "Dad, those gummy bears are cute, but don't you think it's a bit too much?"--and let them digest the suggestion slowly. Diplomacy can be impactful.

If you really have lost your patience, better stay silent for a while. They didn't get their stuff easily. We know that. Everything they own are sentimental. Possessing is a sentimental thing for them.

Note: in other cases, some parents have different approaches and language--so, it's important to really know your parents deeply--really, if you do this project with them, you'll understand them better and will discover the best way to communicate.

2. Beware of self-containing excuses. 
It's okay to purchase a box of new teacups, I've donated 2 of my old teacups...Well, isn't that just silly? We take out a little then add more and more? We do that--sometimes--under the feeling of treating ourselves--just like eating something good after you get good grades or perhaps your parents gave you prizes if you've achieved the best score at school back then? Oh well, it's just a childhood habit and you actually know what not to continue if you want to declutter! Yea, free yourself from that. Keep your eagerness to get a substitute for a while, then...it will dissapear. Trust me. Fill the void with a teatime or a cuddle with cats, it's even better.

3. Welcome your feelings and move on. 
While we dig and unwire our clutter maze and piles, we're going to face so many...emotional states. Good and bad memories, guilts, surprises, guilts...anything! Don't be offensive or defensive. Know it. Accept yourself as you in the past, you of now, and make way for the future you to embrace. We may feel bad to toss our friends' random giveaways, or our luxury purchase that we don't actually use/wear, let those feelings come inside, face it, and don't let any physical item trap them inside you! As the uneccessary item goes, there goes your sentiments too, and you'll be free. Any matters won't be happy to just stay inside a drawer, being forgotten, tho'. :)

4. Patience is the key. Don't rush thing. 
Interacting with our inner struggle and other household members can be overwhelming. Always take a rest. Even a famous skillful violinist need to take a rest! Sure...violin is difficult to conquer tho', hahaha. But you know the recipe, right? People need recess, but come back once you're ready to do this again. Don't be afraid that you're going to be late or too slow. It'll reach the goal eventually. Trust yourself. Go, go!

5. Find a community. 
Gather your friends, ask them, show up and tell them how beautiful making life more simple is. Then you'll be encouraged exquisitely! I've done a garage sale with my best friends and it's giving me a new spirit. You're not alone. We're the generation who'd hypnotized by capitalism for a long time but still have chance to fix it--so we can cure The Planet Earth and our psychology puzzles. \

6. Clutter accumulates from neglecting. So, start doing, stop postponing.
Most of the time, our clutter formed by neglecting. My Dad has a pile of unused clothing pieces still wrapped in plastic bag and he even forgot why he let 'em be abandoned on his bookshelf! If only he responded sharply before those stuff became clutter! I did some similar acts, too. I let my random gimmicks stayed for a while in the box...until the box was full and when I opened it I have to dig down to my memory...ew. Note that this habit may actually shape your attitude in work, relationship, and...well, in short, your personality! Yea, I used to be a procrastinator never decided what I actually passionate about. I don't want more people to trapped inside that room of nothingness but regret. Start your life now, let go of all uneccessary stuff and don't let it be there if you don't even remember why it's there!

7. Reinvent your life! 
Live your best life, now. Not later. Not...in 5 years or something like that. We can literally do what we love right now!

Okay, those PancaPoints are great already! Hope you have a good day! I have to get ready for a rehearsal now. <3


---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Tak terasa, saya sudah menjalani niat hidup minimalis selama hampir tiga tahun--idenya memang sudah dari sebelumnya, tapi keteguhannya memang baru nongol sekitar 2015. Awalnya iseng, tapi kok tahu-tahu kamar saya jadi kosong dan nyaman...pikiran saya jadi rapi, ah, efeknya memang ajaib! Dan ketika saya mau ngajak orang tua, saya merasakan makin banyak hal-hal lucu yang kami alami, karena pikiran kami jernihan sikit. Sikit...lumayanlah.

Sebagai penutup tahun 2018 yang kece, saya pingin nulis beberapa poin tentang minimalisme yang menurut saya lumayan penting dan esensial dalam proyek ini. Mungkin, ke depannya ini bukan cuma proyek, tapi jadi gaya hidup! Karena, wew, kebaikannya bisa mengalir ke hati dan Bumi dan dunia.

Baik, mari dimulai:

1. Kalau sama orang tua, sebaiknya lebih hati-hati ngomongnya (tapi konsisten). Umur saya sekitar 20an, dan orang tua saya merupakan generasi babyboomers. Mereka mengalami banyak momen-momen emosional--perang usai, negara tidak stabil, dapet apa-apa susah, gonjang-ganjing--intinya, kebanyakan dari generasi orang tua saya memang bukan orang yang batinnya tenang. Mereka terdidik untuk hati-hati, sensitif, baper ke segala ranah sampai ke benda-benda fisik. Apalagi, produk seni zaman itu juga, sebelum surealisme muncul, banyaknya drama-drama romantis dan tentang perang yang banyak adegan kehilangan...pokoknya susah deh. Saya enak--zaman teknologi, mau apa-apa mudah. Oh, terus, perhatiin deh, cara mereka dididik oleh kakek-nenek kita, sangat vertikal! Mereka nggak bisa betul-betul 'temenan' sama orang tuanya--malah harus hormat, sopan, nurut, dan kadang itu didasari oleh harga diri dan ketakutan doang.

Tapi intinya, sabar-sabarlah--kalau memang mau ajak mereka minimalis dan nol sampah. Mereka mungkin pusing karena sudah mengalami nyamannya pakai benda-benda sekali pakai, plastik sekali buang, deterjen-deterjen, produk-produk makanan yang serba inovatif (di zamannya), pakai benda-benda prestisius biar dianggap berada, suka koleksi barang yang buat mereka susah banget dulu dapetnya (padahal teronggok gak dipakai)...banyaklah tetek bengeknya. Mama saya mencak-mencak pas saya ajuin mau bikin kompos, nggak pakai sedotan, bikin ecoenzyme dan pakai sabun lerak, susah-susah nyuci pembalut kain, jual-jual baju ("Kamu orang susah emangnya, sampai harus jual baju bekas segala?!") dan sebagainya. Memang awalnya mencak-mencak tapi udahnya terima kok, hehe. Walau suka ada ngomelnya. Papa saya juga pelan-pelan mau kok jualin barangnya, beresin, nggak menunda, memang sih, kasihan generasi mereka ini banyak penyangkalan emosionalnya...yang disalurin ke materi, akhirnya.

2. Hati-hati, kita suka memanjakan diri tapi ngawur. 
Kemarin aku jual tiga baju, besok aku boleh beli sepuluh kaos kaki, kan? Nggak seekstrim itu sih, tapi adaaa aja yang kita kompromikan, betuuul? Kita memang suka 'dijilat' oleh kebiasaan memberi reward. Nilai bagus, minta hadiah hape ke ortu. Memang gitu...DULU. Kalau memang niat kita memberi lowong untuk hal-hal baik, jangan terjebak. Jual tiga baju, ya udah, biarin aja kosong tiga slot! Kecuali kalau buang kaos kaki bolong satu-satunya lalu beli kaos kaki baru--ya itu sih manusiawi.

3. Hadapi saja perasaanmu, terima, lalu buruan move on. 
Memang, menghadapi tumpukan barang yang sudah kita kumpulkan di bawah sadar, bisa mengungkit emosi-emosi aneh! Misal, pemberian mantan (wkwk) yang...sebetulnya kamu udah nggak suka atau pakai tapi kamu simpen hanya karena itu dari mantan. Atau baju dari kakakmu yang nggak pernah pas kamu kenakan, cuma kamu takut kakakmu nanyain lagi. Sebetul-betulnya, kebanyakan hadiah-hadiah atau penghargaan gitu, akan terlupakan juga! Yang paling penting sebetulnya perasaan bahagia ketika kita mendapatkannya. Perasaan bahwa kita disayang, diperhatikan...benda-benda fisik itu cuma mewakili perasaannya saja. Mana yang bikin kamu senyum-senyum sendiri? Barang-nya atau kenangan atas momen diberinya? Atau...sesuatu yang memang kita beli sendiri, mahal, tapi toh tidak dipakai, bukankah setiap saat kamu akan merasa bersalah terus jika barang itu ada di pandangan? Nyesal karena suka impulsif? Ya sudah, katakan keras-keras, "Memang aku waktu itu khilaf, tapi sekarang nggak lagi. Makasih sudah memberikan pelajaran!" dan, keluarin saja barangnya! Terima aja, kita semua pernah kacrut. :))

4. SABAR. 
Inti dari semua proses pembersihan rumah dan batin memang...sabar. Setiap orang ada ritme dan kecepatannya masing-masing. Gitu aja, singkat, kan?

5. Cari komunitas. 
Sungguh, pengaruh teman-teman dalam kegiatan bebersih bisa sangat menolong! Saya sendiri sampai punya teman untuk saling cerita tentang susuh-susuh dalam rumah, untuk track berapa jumlah item-item kita dan apakah relevan. Saya juga sempat garage sale bareng teman-teman dan kami sama-sama gembira bisa ngurangin betrak-betruk terabaikan. Sekarang banyak akun Instagram berkisar minimalisme, dan buku-buku mengenai itu! Jadi, kita nggak sendiri!

6. Susuh terjadi karena mengabaikan. Ayo mulai sekarang atasi segalanya segera! 
Ayah saya punya baju-baju yang ternyata masih tersimpan di plastik, dan ditaruh di atas buku-buku dalam rak. KAN KELEWATAN. Ketika saya tanya, dia pun lupa kenapa dia letakkan di sana...tapi saya tahu, intinya, dia menunda 'rencana'nya tentang pakaian-pakaian tersebut. Tidak cuma itu, masih...masih seru banget deh rak buku ayah saya, proyek yang menarik untuk saya bongkar! Nah, seberapa sering kita menunda? Nggak jarang sih pasti. Efeknya? Hmm...saya pernah punya kotak isinya semua hal yang saya cuma nggak tahu mau diapain atau ceritanya mau saya apain, tapi nggak pernah diteruskan. Alhasil, kotak tersebut penuh banget sampai nggak bisa ditutup dan...yah, saya jadi sadar betapa akutnya kemalasan kita! Mulai sekarang, yuk kita atasi masalah-masalah sesegera mungkin. Sebelum kecintaan menunda menjelma jadi kebiasaan di tempat kerja, di keluarga, dalam hubungan, pertemanan, dan segalanya! 

7. Hidup lagi sesuai mimpimu! 
Bersih, senang, dan jangan ditumpuk-tumpuk lagi semuanya. Hiduplah dengan kalem, perlahan, tapi terfokus. Ngapain nunggu bertahun-tahun ke depan?